Beyoncé declared that girls run the world. Kesha loudly declared that she was an
woman, and Demi Lovato asked, “What’s wrong with being confident?”
The response to that query? Absolutely nada. Nevertheless, regardless of the messages received,
female empowerment
out there, women
still
Feel compelled to constantly say “I’m sorry” for anything ranging from the weather to raising their hand to suggest an idea during a work meeting. Why do they do this?
“At an early age, girls frequently receive compliments for being courteous, amenable, or easy-going,” she elucidates.
Dr. Brittany McGeehan, Ph.D
.
, licensed psychologist explains. “‘I’m sorry’ often serves as an easy way to stay out of trouble, maintain harmony, and ease tension—particularly in male-oriented settings, families where expressing feelings was frowned upon, or professional spaces that value obedience more than direct communication.’”
Dr. McGeehan suggests that apologies are occasionally essential—even beautiful at times. However, surprisingly, they can also have detrimental effects.
Relying on them consistently undermines your authority and causes confusion.”
boundaries
and slowly
erodes self-trust
Dr. McGeehan states, ‘To put it simply, excessive apologizing can result in self-neglect.’
Be unwaveringly authentic by following the example of a
confident woman’s playbook
Dr. McGeehan and other psychologists list 12 items that confident women do not feel sorry about.
Related:
10 Alternatives to Using ‘Sorry’ Automatically, Says a Therapist
12 Items Women Shouldn’t Feel Sorry About, Experts Claim
1. Having emotions
Women are frequently told they are “overly sensitive” or ”
too sensitive
However, a psychologist points out that confident women understand their emotions are not weaknesses or deserving of ridicule.
“Feelings are an inherent aspect of being human, rather than a mark of frailty,” he states.
Dr. Gayle MacBride, Ph.D., L.P.C.
, a psychologist at Veritas Psychology Partners. “A self-assured woman recognizes that embracing her feelings—be they happiness, sorrow, rage, or terror—is an integral aspect of her resilience.”
Related:
12 Indicators That You Could Be a ‘ HighlySensitivePerson,’ Says a Therapist
2. Her feats and successes
Ascending the career ladder or breaking a personal record in a marathon shouldn’t require disclaimers or apologies.
“A woman who has established, achieved, and perhaps even exceeded her personal objectives should never feel obligated to apologize or minimize her accomplishments,” according to the report.
Dr. Michele Goldman, Ph.D.
,
A psychologist and media advisor for the Hope for Depression Research Foundation stated, “Achieving success requires talent, effort, and intellect, and no woman should feel pressured to diminish herself. Rather, she should take pride in her well-earned achievements.”
Related:
10 Actions Confident Individuals Never Fail to Execute During a Discussion
3. Owning her power
Individuals having children or grandchildren who adore
Frozen 2
will understand that Elsa discovered how to present herself partly by embracing her strength without reservation. This lesson isn’t just from a fairy tale; it’s something self-assured women experience every day in their lives.
“Using ‘power’ isn’t wrong, yet one must handle it with care,” asserts Dr. MacBride. “Power means having an impact on both your personal journey and the environment surrounding you. Regardless of whether this power stems from their intelligence, abilities, guidance, or charm, a self-assured woman shouldn’t diminish her capabilities to please others. Expressing regret over possessing such authority merely strengthens the notion that women ought to feel embarrassed about their prowess instead of embracing it as something commendable.”
Related:
Individuals Who Were Referred to As Being ‘OverlySensitive’ During Their Childhood Often Exhibit These 14 Characteristics When They Become Adults, According to psychologists
4. Taking up space
You have permission to be present, even when surrounded by people.
Occupying space could appear as voicing your opinion during a meeting, celebrating an achievement, or just simplement
not
shrinking in your body or voice,” Dr. McGeehan says. “Apologizing for taking up space signals internalized shame about your presence. A confident woman enters a room like she belongs—not because she’s arrogant, but because she has stopped seeking permission and knows that she belongs in every space she is in.”
Related:
10 Expressions for Successfully Initiating a Chat, As Suggested by Experts in Psychology
5. Holding varied perspectives and beliefs
Dr. MacBride mentions that self-assured women believe their opinions matter, and he states that “a variety of viewpoints fosters advancement.”
She stresses, “There should be no pressure on her to conform merely to evade disputes or satisfy others.” She adds, “Issuing apologies for holding different views implies that her perspectives carry lesser weight compared to those around her. Such constant apologies may erode both her self-assurance and the respect with which people regard her contributions. This approach values avoiding confrontation over encouraging the team to genuinely consider alternate viewpoints.”
6. Things outside of your control
Even the most confident and empowered women understand they are not invincible.
Dr. McGeehan explains that a self-assured woman recognizes events beyond her control can occur. Such women handle these scenarios by accepting them as they unfold, yet also assuming an adequate level of accountability. For instance, upon arriving tardy to a meeting, she may express gratitude towards others for remaining patient.
Self-assured women won’t feel the need to apologize because of a delayed train messing up their coworker’s journey; however, they will express understanding. According to Dr. McGeehan, such a woman may comment, “It sounds like your day has been tough so far.”
Related:
Individuals Whose Parents Never Said ‘I’m Sorry’ Frequently Exhibit These 10 Characteristics in Adulthood, According to Experts
7. Having a need
Dr. McGeehen believes that saying sorry for having certain needs is significant when dealing with women and expresses regret about this expectation.
She states that needs aren’t burdens; they form the basis for genuine, reciprocal connections and are inherently human.” Confident women understand that their requirements aren’t excessive—it’s about having information and interacting with them respectfully.
8. To practice self-care
“As they say, self-care isn’t selfish; it’s essential for one’s own preservation,” shares
Dr. Jan Miller, Ph.D
., licensed psychologist
with
Thriveworks
.
Certainly, Dr. Miller points out that it can be challenging to view it this way in a culture that sees productivity as a virtuous trait and considers taking time to slow down as being lazy.
She points out that women frequently feel compelled to explain and atone for taking time off,” she says. “In truth, breaks hold equal importance as productivity and action. Actually, feeling well-rested enhances our ability to perform tasks effectively.
Related:
13 Subtle Indicators of Mental Strength in Women, Say Psychologists
9. Not replying immediately
As we discuss how rest isn’t considered laziness, Dr. McGeehan points out, “It’s okay to proceed at a sustainable pace.” He adds, “Others’ delays aren’t your crisis, and you shouldn’t feel obligated to be constantly accessible to everybody else whenever they need you.”
Nevertheless, she argues that saying sorry for not replying instantly implies you made a mistake, even though you didn’t.
“She points out that apologizing for delayed responses can perpetuate an always-on culture and set expectations for round-the-clock availability. Confident women safeguard their energy and choose to respond only when they’re prepared, without further explanation,” she says.
Related:
Individuals Who Were Raised By Emotionally Underdeveloped Parents Frequently Exhibit These 12 Characteristics As Grown-Ups, Say Experts
10. Saying “no”
You simply can’t agree to every single thing.
“When women over-apologize for
declining requests
“Dr. McGeehan mentions that confident women express their refusal plainly without being harsh, understanding that setting limits fosters clarity rather than causing disputes,” he explains.
When Dr. McGeehan has to turn down a request, she does so politely.
communicates the boundary
Thank you very much for reaching out. But I’m quite content with how busy I am right now, hence I won’t be taking on more social activities at the moment.
Related:
‘I’ve Been Into Self-Improvement for Over 15 Years and This Is the #1 Thing That’s Transformed My Growth Journey the Most’
11. Past choices
Self-assured women thrive, acquire knowledge, and release their grip.
As those previous decisions enabled women to gain knowledge and mature,” Dr. Goldman highlights, “they have led them to their current situation today. Hence, there’s no reason to regret these actions. In fact, a self-assured woman might see this as a cause for gratitude.
Related:
6 Things Highly Successful Individuals Always Practice During Conversations, Says a Neuropsychotherapist
12. Their bodies
According to Dr. Miller, women get messages from an early age about how their bodies are supposed to appear.
She emphasizes that every woman’s body is distinct and should never require an apology—period. Apologies stemming from perceived flaws in one’s physique can result in feelings of shame, anxiety, depression, and unhealthy eating habits.
She emphasizes that embracing your body just as it is can enhance self-love, body confidence, and general well-being.
Related:
7 Actions to Take While Apologizing Since Simply Saying ‘I’m Sorry’ Isn’t Enough
When a Self-Assured Woman Will Offer an Apology
Confident women also know when an apology is in order.
Sometimes, apologies become necessary and beneficial,” explains Dr. Miller. “An apology serves to show understanding that a certain rule or limit has been crossed, causing harm to another person. Therefore, women ought to express regret when they realize their actions were mistaken. This creates a chance for mending relationships and facilitating recovery.
Dr. McGeehan concurs that it’s particularly important to apologize when you cross someone else’s boundaries, especially if you were aware of doing so. She adds that self-assured women typically recognize that nobody—themselves included—is flawless and are ready to admit their mistakes.
“It’s inevitable that we will cross someone else’s boundary at some point because we are human,” Dr. McGeehan says. “It’s just critical to take accountability when we do. Confident women don’t just try to avoid harm—they also take accountability when it happens.”
Up Next:
Related: If You Use These 8 Unexpected Phrases, You Have Higher Self-Confidence Than Most, Psychologists Say
Sources:
-
Dr. Brittany McGeehan, Ph.D
., licensed psychologist -
Dr. Gayle MacBride, Ph.D., LPN
a psychologist affiliated with Veritas Psychology Partners -
Dr. Michele Goldman, Ph.D.
, a psychologist and media advisor for the Hope for Depression Research Foundation -
Dr. Jan Miller, Ph.D., a licensed psychologist
with
Thriveworks